Coretan Hati Felixia - 2

Terima kasih sangat-sangat kepada semua yang sudi tinggalkan pesanan dan mesej-mesej yang positif, yang neutral dan yang ikhlas. Felixia amat terharu...I am so touched. Memang tergenang airmata Felixia membaca a few of them.

Dari kaum Adam dan terutamanya dari kaum Hawa. Dari yang beragama Islam dan juga segelintir yang bukan beragama Islam. Terima kasih sebab memahami isi hati Felixia. Terima kasih for not being judgemental and harsh on my personal dressing preference. Terima kasih for accepting me as I am, as I progress on in life.

I know some, they despise me, give me sarcastic comments and even "Unlike" my page due to me trying on hijab and wearing Malay traditional clothes. Some even sarcastically commented on religious and ethnic issues. Itu yang Felixia sedih nak baca.

Felixia berdiam diri sahajalah...the more I fight back, the more they will provoke. 

Tapi it's ok. Felixia tahu Felixia tak buat salah. 

If they want the normal Malaysian-Chinese models yang pose seksi-seksi and cute, yang reti membaca dan menulis Bahasa Cina dalam Facebook posts, yang fikirannya sehaluan dengan kebanyakkan....I know there is a lot of these models out there. 

You guys can go to them if you cannot accept me as who I am.

I did not hurt you, so why wanna hurt my feelings?

Let them be them, and let me be me too.

I bukan boneka. 

Cukuplah sekadar masa berkerja tu, Felixia jadi boneka untuk semua. 

Demi keperluan kerja.

Pasal perkara menutup aurat tu, memang Felixia dah lama simpan niat. 

Ya....IKHLAS.

I won't deny it, although I ni ex-Playboy Bunny (NOT NAKED), pernah masuk majalah Playboy (NOT NAKED TOO, just in swimsuit!), banyak kali masuk local men's magazines, car magazines...and it sounds ridiculous for someone like me dengan niat nak tutup aurat.

Tapi sebab nak cari rezeki tanggung perbelanjaan keluarga, Felixia continue saja la kerja modelling.

Tak salah if semuanya secara profesional dan tak melanggar undang-undang, betul tak?

Lagipun gajinya memanglah tak boleh nak dibanding dengan gaji masa Felixia ni cikgu tadika dulu-dulu.

Mungkin suatu hari nanti, bila financial Felixia dah stable sikit, Felixia akan kembali jadi cikgu. =)

Pasal speaking in Bahasa Melayu, Felixia memang dah lama fasih. Sejak dari kecil lagi dah fasih. *ahem*

Yang 6A1s dalam keputusan SPM Felixia tu, salah satu A1 tu dalam subjek Bahasa Melayu....hehehe!

Ok...Ok...Felixa mengaku, memang dah karat sedikit Bahasa Felixia ni kekadang...tapi bolehlah dipakai juga, kan? 

So girls, and guys, please keep your feedbacks coming in! 

Your words of encouragement and support means a lot to me! =)

If ada salah silap kata guna perkataan tu, bolehlah tunjukkan, beri panduan and tegur...secara baik. 

Felixia tak ada niat nak menyakiti perasaan sesiapapun. 

OK tak?

P.S: I am not Muslim or Malay, just a Malaysian-Chinese girl who loves the hijab fashion and traditional wear.

And I will...improve my hijab style. Maklumlah...ni pun testing lagi. 

Tak pandai nak pakai lagi. Teragak-agak saja cara pemakaian hijab. Sabar ya?

Hehehe! 

Itu saja coretan hati kali ini. =)

Coretan hati yang kecewa

Seperti yang dijangkakan...memang dasar kebanyakkan manusia tu suka sangat nak jadi judgemental.

Apa salahnya kalau Felixia suka pakai baju-baju yang menutup aurat terutamanya baju muslimah dan baju tradisional Melayu?

Tak boleh ke Felixia pakai kalau bukan orang Islam?

Kenapa suka sangat nak jadi batu api, nak tambahkan isu-isu racist di kalangan orang Malaysia?

Salah sangat ke if model macam Felixia ni nak tutup aurat kalau tak kerja?

Yang mengutuk Felixia sebab pakai baju tradisional Melayu tu, yang kata Felixia overdoing it...ada tak dalam undang-undang yang mengatakan perempuan Cina tak boleh pakai baju Melayu yang tutup aurat?

Yang mengutuk Felixia, marah sebab Felixia pakai walaupun bukan orang Islam, sebab kerja Felixia sebagai model adakalanya memerlukan Felixia memakai baju-baju seksi sedikit, apa salahnya kalau Felixia sendiri yang ikhlas ingin menutup aurat lepas kerja?

Kerja tu hanyalah kerja.

Hanya nak mencari sesuap nasi. Tak salah nak kerja if rezeki tu halal.

Felixia bukannya mencuri, mengoda lelaki orang atau merampas rezeki orang lain.

Bila off work, suka hati lah Felixia nak jadi sendiri, nak pakai pakaian yang Felixia nak pakai.

Ada juga kawan sendiri yang menyisih, sebab rasa Felixia ni pelik, bah ada yang katakan taste Felixia ni menakutkan. Ekspresi muka yang penuh dengan beribu persoalan ke atas pemakaian Felixia. Pedih hati. Susah sangat ke nak terima Felixia ni dengan seadanya?

Sudah lah kalau nak pandang semacam je, macam Felixia ni pelik sangat, tapi mulut tu biarlah berpada-pada sikit.

Yang I post gambar all covered up tu, buat apa nak komen suruh Felixia bogel, tanggal baju???

Tahap nafsu tu tinggi sangat ke, sampai nak suruh orang yang ikhlas nak tutup aurat tu bogelkan badan??

Kalau Felixia, seorang model yang pernah masuk majalah Playboy boleh ikhlas nak tutup aurat, kenapa yang suka mengutuk tu tak boleh sedar diri sikit, learn to bertaubat sikit?

Bukan marah, tapi cuma kecewa.

Felixia juga suka tengok orang yang berhijab. Sweet sangat...so Felixia curi-curi belajar pakai hijab. Salah juga ke?

Tak mengapa la...apa daya Felixia, kan?

Kalau orang nak mengata, nak mengutuk, nak memaki...Felixia cuma boleh bersabar sahaja.

Janji hati Felixia ikhlas, tak ada bad intention kepada sesiapa pun.

Tapi Felixia tak juga lupakan yang seringkali memberi Felixia sokongan, encouragement dan feedback yang positif...Felixia amat bersyukur sekali. Ada juga yang menerima Felixia dengan seadanya. =)

Itu saja coretan hati kali ini.

The Chinese Girl who loves Malay clothes.

Lately I am sure you guys do notice me wearing a lot of Malay (Muslimah) clothing, which is covered up and decent looking. 

And I had declared openly in my Facebook fan page regarding the fact that I am obsessed with the way Malay women wear their "tutup aurat" type of wear, and that I don't really care if people are staring at me in a weird manner.

Before you read the following statements about myself, I would advise you to swallow down the coffee you just sipped, or any type of liquid that's in your mouth to prevent anything from splashing onto your laptop/smartphone/computer screens...

I am a Playboy magazine model.

I am a former Playboy Bunny.

I am FHM cover girl this month.

I am an ambassador for Momo, a breast firming health drink.

I am also well known to be photographed in my lingerie, bikinis and sexy race queen outfits.

Pretty much of these things that I do require not more than a metre of fabric.

But ironically, I secretly love to dress up like those girls who wear tudung, selendang, turban and baju kurung, kaftan, abaya, jubah and kebaya.

Now...don't get me wrong, I am a Malaysian-Chinese, not converted into Islam, not trying to make anyone happy or impressed, not trying to convert (well, unless my future husband happens to be a Muslim, I'd be happy to convert!) and not trying to pull a publicity stunt.

What I do is just my work as a model, but it does not decide my personal lifestyle and preferences.

Just because I am a model, does NOT mean I smoke, I drink, I party until the wee hours of dawn, and certainly does not mean I am always showing cleavages or thighs.

You must be wondering on why do I like Muslimah's wear.

Simple. Because it feels so much better to be respected, looked upon and taken seriously when you are attracting people with the real beauty of a woman's soft facial features, your personality, your grace and your elegance.

I simply believe that a true beauty is when you cover her body and hair (which with the correct styling plays a major role in beautifying a woman's entire look), and you still see a beautiful person, regardlessly. That...is true beauty. =)

Undeniably, I love Muslimah clothing because of they are actually really well designed, comfortable and elegant. I love how they are decorated with manik-manik, labuci, diamantes, laces with really traditional motives. Its actually pretty amazing how good our local designers are with their creativity, in making their designs traditionally decent yet somehow still subtly seductive, conservative yet modern, and all covered up yet still able to be comfortable to wear.

Personally, I love designs from Jovian Mandagie, Radzuan Radziwill, Yadotsa, and Rizalman.

So people are gonna keep staring...but I am still gonna keep wearing.

Hmm...still rasa pelik tak?